I learned years ago that using positive reinforcement is a valuable tool when raising a child. As a parent, I am an expert at being a parent, I am not a doctor and the information I give is what has worked in my home, my daycare, and with my children. I am a parent of a son with Asperger’s, and a daughter that is mainstreamed general education. Both of my children are high school graduates and living life productively. I found using positive reinforcement valuable while giving my children directions they would understand and relieved everyone’s frustrations that were involved.
What is positive reinforcement?
- It is speaking in a positive tone and giving a positive statement. Once the positive tone is achieved, the child’s feeling in the situation is positive and is able to absorb what is being said to the child. Of course, this depends on the child’s age and their level of learning.
- The positive outcome may take longer considering the level of learning of the children involved. When using negative tones the child shuts down and does not absorb the information as quickly or as accurately.
- If the situation calls for the discipline you must be positive with your initial tone. Once the tone is set, you would give the discipline statement. Once you start yelling or showing in your tone that you are frustrated the child will not absorb what you are saying, the information will be blocked out.
- Being yelled at and even disciplined is painful, in front of your friend is humiliating. No one likes or cares to be in this type of situation. The child should, from what I have seen, understand and stop the wrong behavior because they will not feel a negative tone in your direction.
- Children misbehave because they are frustrated. Stop the frustration, stop the behavior. I am not saying this technique is easy. Using positive reinforcement during a difficult situation takes A LOT of practice.
- If we, the adult, is frustrated, so will the child be. Children absorb the feeling in a room and feed off it and absorb the mood. A child having a meltdown or temper tantrum comes from the child’s frustration, internal and externally.
I hope positive reinforcement helps you as it has my family.
Please view the program, Visually Necessary, a program when used in a classroom setting, will change how children interact with each other. You will also want to read the next post in this series Visual Aid Techniques to help your child feel less frustration where the techniques I learned I teach in a daycare.